I dunno anything.

I dunno what to feel
I dun wanna feel
I dunno wat to say
I got nothing to say
I dunno how to love
I dun wanna love

I dun wanna hurt
doesn't mean I dun hurt
and it hurts.

I jus wan my world to be simple
but a simple world is too complicated for a complicated gal.

****

I know d feeling of disappoinment and loss of self-worth
the intensity increases with hope, expectations and attached self-esteem.
A direct analogy is that of my seemingly disapointing tests, report & project.
A dip in my self-efficacy and an increased in learned helplessness (2 psych terms which seem relevantly appropiate.)
Result?
fear of expectation and loss of hope- (I'm not eager collecting my essay tmr, I feel nothing abt test, and I ain't looking forward to a honours yr.)
maybe tat's what sustain my laid back attitude.
I'll tk watever tat comes, cuz anything extra is a life bonus.
but, this is not entirely healthy.
one's life is sustained by motivation and self-actualizing.
U wanna tk life,
u must prove to be more dynamic.

Anyhow, my life ain't jus worth a grade or a degree
jus like a single facet in life doesn't equate a failure in u
to tk sucess and failing in ur stride
is what make u a winner in life.

but then again,
i dun believe in being a faliure.
failing means u had given urself a chance but the outcome wasn't exactly what u want.
by taking chances makes u an inherent winner.
therefore,
to be able to accept life's peaks and lows
is what define a true winner.

May everyone emerge a winner today.
bless u.